So, I've been running now for 5 months and really only "training" for 10 weeks. But finally, I feel like a "runner". I may not be the fastest, but I can do the 5k and not die and not walk and that is huge for me. I am actually enjoying it too, which is funny because I didn't enjoy running when I ran track for four years!
My first 5k is in a week and I am excited to prove myself.
Ella and I picked up another hobby tonight--horseback riding lessons! This was my little girl dream and I'm really excited to share this hour each week with my daughter. Ella was quite the natural and loved every minute. She wasn't afraid to trot her horse, saddle it, groom it, or feed it. Funny thing is, that I was actually a little intimidated at first.
These two hobbies made me realize something. I have let a lot of self doubt seep into my life, especially this past year. When everything seems like a question mark and every decision seems like a mountain I am not sure I can climb, these two hobbies just might keep me sane. With running, I have to focus very hard on my breathing. If I don't, I can't pace myself. Also, it was such a huge accomplishment to get to my 5k distance that it made me face myself with the "I can do this" mentality. I am going to keep setting goals and see how far this can take me.
The horseback riding, while only lesson one, taught me a few things too. First, I tend to doubt myself before I even begin. I have never had any reservations around horses but I was worried I'd look too inexperienced or embarass myself when trying to saddle it. Once I got on, I was good. I looked at Ella who had no fear at all and was completely okay with being told to loosen by grip, use my knees, etc.
I realized tonight that I've let a lot of myself go these past few years. When people asked what I liked to do, there wasn't much there. So, I am feeling a little liberated and a little more confident, which all in all, is pretty good for a couple of hobbies!