Warning...pity party

One month ago I thought I'd come to grips with the idea that we may not be relocating. Our prayers, while I'm sure were answered, were answered "no". Here we still sit in limbo of a decision I just can't bring myself to make. Yet little by little I am having to. Today I finally made myself call the school we planned on sending the kids to this fall...the school we have prepped them for, met the teachers at, etc.,.and told them it didn't look like we should remain on their rosters. I have avoided this step because it means we are giving up. I keep telling our realtor that we will decide by "the end of the week" whether we are done trying to sell, and I've said this now for at least a month. I just can't do it. I've told the builder not to renew our pending lot, but I can't bring myself to pull the stop all together. This week several new houses went up on our neighborhood as it is transfer season around here. We just can't compete with them. We have said we will list fsbo if we take our house off the MLS, but we know that we won't get showings for people transferring here who are with realtors. I think the worst part is how frustrated I've become in prayer. I have personally seen His works in our lives and I have faced hard disappointments before, weathered them and come out on the other side, always able to acknowledge His perfect decision, even if it wasn't what I wanted. I know prayers are always answered but sometimes the answer is no. I just don't get why this seemed so right in the beginning, why we had 3 offers not work, why didn't He just make "no" obvious from the start? We keep praying...for clarification...a sense of peace about quitting, at least. I know the stress of this situation, going on 8 months now, is taking its toll on us all. What we were so sure was best for our family is draining us and apparently is not best right now.